I get insurance through the Washington Benefits exchange. Up until January, I haven't had any problems either with the exchange or the insurance company itself.
Starting in January, my insurance company, to whom I have paid more than $800 in premiums this year, in refusing to recognize that I have health insurance. My doctor's office can't verify that I have insurance, I'm having to pay for all of mine and my husband's prescriptions out of pocket. Some of these are really not cheap. They would be more affordable for us if I weren't paying insurance premiums. I've called the insurance company multiple times, and each time they tell me that they are "working on it." It's been four months.
A few weeks ago I called the Washington Benefits Exchange directly and told them what was going on. The call was dropped but I was on the phone long enough to get them to write a work order to see what the hell is going on. As of today I hadn't heard back from them, so I called them again, this time I made them put "medically urgent" on the ticket so maybe that will help.
My ADHD medication is expensive. One month's worth is almost as much as the insurance premiums when paying out of pocket. At first I was just paying cash for them at my pharmacy, thinking I would send the receipts off to my Insurance company for reimbursement. I sent the receipts, and I got a letter saying that there isn't a record of us currently having coverage, so no reimbursement.
As a result of this fiasco, I haven't been able to fill my ADHD medication prescription. I've been out for two weeks, and I'm going crazy. My brain is going so fast that I can't keep up with it, time seems to stand still, I'm panicking over tiny little things, I'm having anxiety attacks, it's difficult to handle my kids, I've fallen off my weight loss wagon. In fact, I've gained back all the weight I lost. It is all very frustrating. I'm having trouble controlling my anger and frustration.
To top it off, the tendinitis in my foot is flaring up again, and my doctor won't prescribe the medication I need to treat it without me coming in for a face to face visit. The cash price for a visit to my doctor is about $200.
All I can do now is wait for other people to fix this. I've done all I can do, and now I get to hurry up and wait. Waiting is difficult, especially when I haven't had my ADHD meds for a couple of weeks.
My thyroid and depression medication are both (luckily) fairly inexpensive and for some reason the insurance's mail order refill service is still filling my requests through them. Since those medications are ones that have to build up in a system before really taking effect, I haven't run out of either of those medications. They help take the edge off of my mental conditions, but the one that really makes the biggest difference is my ADHD medications. It fixes some chemicals in my brain that are crucial to everyday functioning, motivation, impulse control, task completion, and my ability not to overreact to things.
Being without my ADHD medications is like having to go without my brain. I can't focus on anything, I can't remember things, I lose things. It is just not a fun time to be me.
I'm sick to death of this crap. Every so often I get to attempt life without my medications because of some insurance fuck up, and I am so very tired of it.
I feel like this blog post is really unorganized, but that might just be my brain refusing to acknowledge organization.
I have realized that the state of my house directly correlates to my mental state. At the moment, my house is a disaster area. More so than usual. I can't find any motivation to do much but the most basic things: make sure there are dishes to eat off of, make sure that garbage is not overflowing and stinky, make sure there are clean, if not organized and put away, clothes, make sure the animals have food and water, make sure the kids are clean and fed.
I need to do so many things, but as the days without medication continue, the ability to do any of these things dwindles and the depression starts to get worse. It is a viscous cycle. I can't seem to get/keep things clean and that makes me depressed, and because I'm depressed I can't find the motivation to do things. I feel like a bump on a log most of the time, but I honestly can't bring myself to do much about it. The more I try to talk myself into doing more than just the necessary basics, the more my brain wants to be a couch potato.
I keep thinking that this will all by resolved soon, that my insurance company will be made to heel, but it has been four months so far and I'm still waiting.
I hate waiting.
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